Another night of possible insomnia. Another pointless and random blog entry. So now that the reason for this entry has been established I will begin...
Deep thoughts = confusion on my part. The deeper my thoughts tend to go, the more confusing my future plans become. Life seems to be trickier than I once imagined it would be. Why? Could it be that as one grows and matures in their life that matters once thought simple become more and more complex? Is maturity to blame? Are one's experiences in life the true culprits of complicating life? Life just becomes more and more mysterious with each new day. Things I considered to be obvious components of my future life yesterday are now suddenly doubtful in my opinion today. The more I think about what I want to do with my life, the more unsure I become about what I really want to do. I feel I have a calling, a purpose I was born into this world for, but I haven't the foggiest idea what that may be. Do I really have as much time to figure this all out as I think I do? Or am I on the fast-track to becoming a hobo? If I were to become a hobo, would that be it for me, or would there be a chance of some sort of redemption?
Onto a less melancholy subject... moving back to school. Actually, this seems to be the only thing I am quite certain about right now. I am definitely excited to head back and start this new school year. It promises to be a year for the ages. I can't put my finger on why I feel this way, but I can't help but feel that this year will be big for my life. Which I know is a complete contradiction of the paragraph above, but I can feel both ways at the same time... it is a free country after all. I am super-duper-stoked to be back at school.
Another subject that seems to bring a smile to my face... Pandora.com's Doo-Wop station. If you are a fan of oldies such as myself, it is well worth a try. The old adage of oldies but goodies is definitely applicable to this station. It is most certainly one of the best inventions EVER. PERIOD (I realize that I used an actual period after "EVER" and before "PERIOD" but I just want to really stress that point). If your opinion is contrary to my own, I do not care... you are probably a loser without friends but a million cats... just joking... but seriously...
Anywho, I realize that this blog is perfectly incapable of adding to anyone's life in any way shape or form... so I'm sorry... I guess. Maybe I should have put that last sentence at the beginning of the entry as a form of warning to the reader? Oh well, I'm too lazy to change it now. So with that I will offer up my thanks to you (the readers... all 1-3 of you) for sticking it out and reading the entire thing. Unless you didn't tough it out and you aren't even reading this very sentence, in which case you receive no thanks from me. Try reading the entire thing next time, then and only then will you be granted thanks on my behalf. OK, that was a tangent of massive proportions and I apologize for it.
That is all for now... keep on the look out for more late night musings from yours truly... or midday musings... really my musings can occur at any hour of the day, so just stay vigilant in your following of this blog. Later.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Ethiopia Trip Journal Entry #5
7-13-2009
So today was another truly awesome day. The kids were a treat to be around, like always. They come up with new ways to make me laugh all of the time, they are hilarious. The only real downer about today had to be that I felt sick for the first time all trip, but thankfully I am feeling much better now, even though I still feel extremely exhausted.
Have you ever conversed with an infant before? I ask because I never had until today. The topic of conversation wasn't anything to write home about (or journal about for that matter), but the interaction was awesome. So to answer the previous question, I can now say that I have conversed with an infant. It all started because I was feeling sick by the time we arrived at little AHOPE, so not wanting to collapse while playing with the kids, I went into the infants room. It was quite relaxing just sitting on the floor with them while they played. It was also pretty uneventful. Though that all changed when a little girl looked at me and uttered a peculiar sound, "Aaa" was basically what she said (not a hard "A" sound like Fonzy from "Happy Days," but a softer "A" sound) so naturally I said it back to her (this exchange went on for a few minutes). Then out of nowhere she changed the dynamics of the conversation by making that noise when you kind of flick your bottom lip, so of course I went along with the new topic (I didn't want to be deemed a boring conversationalist). This exchange has pretty much summed up my experience in Ethiopia. I say that because it wasn't anything fancy or forced, it just happened naturally. All of my experiences with the kids here has been something that has happened naturally and they have all been great.
These kids are so amazing. I honestly wish I were more like them. They have been dealt an awful hand in life, but they still have fun and go on with their lives. They are so sweet and funny and full of life. No matter what has happened, is happenening, or will happen to them in life they just keep smiling their infectious smiles and laughing their contagious laughs.
So today was another truly awesome day. The kids were a treat to be around, like always. They come up with new ways to make me laugh all of the time, they are hilarious. The only real downer about today had to be that I felt sick for the first time all trip, but thankfully I am feeling much better now, even though I still feel extremely exhausted.
Have you ever conversed with an infant before? I ask because I never had until today. The topic of conversation wasn't anything to write home about (or journal about for that matter), but the interaction was awesome. So to answer the previous question, I can now say that I have conversed with an infant. It all started because I was feeling sick by the time we arrived at little AHOPE, so not wanting to collapse while playing with the kids, I went into the infants room. It was quite relaxing just sitting on the floor with them while they played. It was also pretty uneventful. Though that all changed when a little girl looked at me and uttered a peculiar sound, "Aaa" was basically what she said (not a hard "A" sound like Fonzy from "Happy Days," but a softer "A" sound) so naturally I said it back to her (this exchange went on for a few minutes). Then out of nowhere she changed the dynamics of the conversation by making that noise when you kind of flick your bottom lip, so of course I went along with the new topic (I didn't want to be deemed a boring conversationalist). This exchange has pretty much summed up my experience in Ethiopia. I say that because it wasn't anything fancy or forced, it just happened naturally. All of my experiences with the kids here has been something that has happened naturally and they have all been great.
These kids are so amazing. I honestly wish I were more like them. They have been dealt an awful hand in life, but they still have fun and go on with their lives. They are so sweet and funny and full of life. No matter what has happened, is happenening, or will happen to them in life they just keep smiling their infectious smiles and laughing their contagious laughs.
Monday, August 3, 2009
Ethiopia Trip Journal Entry #4
7-12-2009
I just finished reading "The Barbarian Way" and it has really changed my thoughts on my faith. It made me realize that I have been playing it safe in my walk with my Saviour. The author mentions that the entire "wall of faith" is comprised of believers that were more than willing to lay down their lives for Christ and in most cases put themselves into those life or death situations on purpose. I want a faith like that. One where my life is only of secondary importance and furthering my heavenly Father's kingdom takes precedence, where the needs of others become my own needs, and where my home is wherever God happens to call me to for that period of time. God's plans for my life, I feel right now, are too grand and extraordinary for me to possibly be able to fathom at this point in my life. I feel called to great things in my life, but I haven't the slightest idea what that all entails... but its a start.
Being around these children has made me very open to the possibility of adopting later on in life, like when I (hopefully) get married someday. These kids have almost nothing going for them, yet they still are so full of joy. Its something I could definitely learn from. I actually told some others on the team that I kind of selfishly hope that like 4 of the kids dont get adopted for a few years, that way I could adopt them myself... but I really hope they do get adopted soon, they would be such a blessing to whoever they go to.
My high-light for today (and maybe for the entire trip, thus far) was after leading a small church service for the kids, we were able to pray for them. It was just simply amazing. One of the boys there basically chose me as his best-friend as soon as he saw me the first day, and I was able to pray for him today. It was just a beautiful time, so much so that I wasn't able to verbalize some of my prayer for him because I was afriad of crying and I didn't want him to see me sobbing. It was a good time.
I just finished reading "The Barbarian Way" and it has really changed my thoughts on my faith. It made me realize that I have been playing it safe in my walk with my Saviour. The author mentions that the entire "wall of faith" is comprised of believers that were more than willing to lay down their lives for Christ and in most cases put themselves into those life or death situations on purpose. I want a faith like that. One where my life is only of secondary importance and furthering my heavenly Father's kingdom takes precedence, where the needs of others become my own needs, and where my home is wherever God happens to call me to for that period of time. God's plans for my life, I feel right now, are too grand and extraordinary for me to possibly be able to fathom at this point in my life. I feel called to great things in my life, but I haven't the slightest idea what that all entails... but its a start.
Being around these children has made me very open to the possibility of adopting later on in life, like when I (hopefully) get married someday. These kids have almost nothing going for them, yet they still are so full of joy. Its something I could definitely learn from. I actually told some others on the team that I kind of selfishly hope that like 4 of the kids dont get adopted for a few years, that way I could adopt them myself... but I really hope they do get adopted soon, they would be such a blessing to whoever they go to.
My high-light for today (and maybe for the entire trip, thus far) was after leading a small church service for the kids, we were able to pray for them. It was just simply amazing. One of the boys there basically chose me as his best-friend as soon as he saw me the first day, and I was able to pray for him today. It was just a beautiful time, so much so that I wasn't able to verbalize some of my prayer for him because I was afriad of crying and I didn't want him to see me sobbing. It was a good time.
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