So the other day my mom was calling a new doctor that we got along with our shiny-new insurance plan. She was trying to make an appointment for me so I could finally get a lumpy-knotty-thing looked at by a professional (not my friends that I showed it to in hopes of getting an "Eew!" from them). While talking to the secretary, she was asked for my birthdate. Instead of saying my birthdate, she quickly demanded that I give her my birthdate. She didn't remember my birthday, I'm her first-born. What makes it even worse is that the secretary wasn't asking for my birthdate, but rather for my dad's (since he is the policy holder). When she was told that my birthdate was not needed, but my dad's was, she immediately spit-out his birthdate with surprising accuracy. She didn't remember her first-born's birthday, she remembered my dad's birthday, and she will never forget my brother's birthday (he was born on Christmas Eve and is known by my mother as her, "Little Christmas Baby!"). I could very easily put on "FML" right here, but that may be considered copyright infringement and I'm not about to get sued over something like this.
There is alumni baseball game tomorrow after church and I, being an alumni, am going to be playing. However, I have not actually played in a game in over two years (not that I haven't tried, but others have tried their best to keep me in the stands instead of the dugout). Needless to say, I'm a little bit rusty (by "a little bit rusty" I really mean, "I'm probably going to suck something awful, but since I haven't really tested out my current capabilities I cannot really say that in complete confidence"). So to correct this, I decided to train a little, and I mean very little... as in the last two-days-little. My shoulder is now sore, my whole left hand is something resembling a throbbing-blistery nub (complete exaggeration, I only have one small blister on my thumb that may have even been caused by yard-work and not baseball related activities. I was going for sympathy), and I'm probably going to suck (I am, unfortunately, not exaggerating this fact). Despite all of this, it should be a lot of fun: getting to play the game I love, just getting to play without any record suffering, and getting to see guys I played with several years ago.
The other night, last night to be more specific, there was open-gym at my old stomping grounds (high school to the laymen). And if you know me, you also know that I am completely inept at anything and everything related to basketball. But, if you know me, you also know that my ineptness (is that even a word?) at basketball doesn't keep me from going out there and trying my darndest (or looking completely and utterly foolish). More often than not (translation: every single time, without fail) I am picked towards the end (translation: very last, sometimes even going unpicked because the team captains "couldn't" see me or "thought" that I was already picked), and my play (and confidence) go down the drain as a result. However, last night I was picked in the middle (HOORAY FOR MEDIOCRITY!!!!!) and my play was actually decent (for the first game anyways...), but as quickly as my skills came to me they also disappeared without even leaving a trace behind. The rest of the guys may have gotten a good laugh at some of the things I did last night, but it is I who am having the last laugh all because they were the ones that wouldn't let me be the last pick (that honor went to a forty-something-year-old guy with a bit of a belly... he often used that as a way of boxing out smaller children).
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
"Tootsie Pop" Rant
This will probably be the most irrelevant entry ever. You have had warning, so continue reading... if you dare... that was a lame attempt at a joke, for which I apologize.
I am most certain everyone who reads this has seen (or at least knows of) the "Tootsie Pop" commercials, where an adolescent is in search of the answer to the question "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a 'Tootsie Pop'?" First he encounters a turtle that does not know the answer, but he politely points him in the direction of the wise old owl. Upon finding the owl, he pops the BIG question ("How many licks does it take to get to the center of a 'Tootsie Pop'?"), the owl promptly takes the "Tootsie Pop" in question and begins licking and counting. However, the owl only licks 3 times before giving up and devouring the remaining "Tootsie Pop" and then tells the adolescent that it takes 3 licks to reach the center. Then the ominous voice-over guy utters the famous words, "The world may never know."
I have always had a problem with that commercial. There was just something that irked me so about it. I could never quite put my finger on it (i just figured I hated the owl for not sincerely trying to count how many licks it would take to reach the center), but I have come up with some reasons. Here they are:
1.) The freaking adolescent has the "Tootsie Pop" along with that question burned into his brain for some odd reason, yet instead of finding out for himself, he turns to animals for the answer. Animals cannot communicate with humans using language... stupid.
2.) The turtle (apparently thought wise enough by the kid to answer his queery) doesn't show that he has any brains whatsoever. He is an old turtle that doesn't seem to be portrayed as being healthy (or happy for that matter). He should have taken the candy basically being handed to him by the dumb kid, eaten it while counting licks, and died happily. However, now the turtle is probably dead and never knew the sweet taste of a "Tootsie Pop"... stupid turtle.
3.) The owl is evil (it seems that "Tootsie Pop" advertisers stole a page out of Jesus' parables, by using birds as a picture of evil). The owl completely takes advantage of an all-too-trusting child (albeit a dumb child). He never really tries to get to the bottom of the question at hand, he just eats it as fast as he can and then hands the lollipopless stick back to the kid... evil, dumb owl.
4.) the commercial contributed to obesity in children (before you disregard that last statement, hear me out... or read me out, whatever is the correct phrase for blogging), though it was in a somewhat round-about way. The child is too lazy to eat the candy that he has, obesity in children is due to inactivity (though, an obese child would probably eat a "Tootsie Pop" faster than you could say, "Dang, that kid ate that candy fast!!!") . That is how I feel the commercial contributed to childhood obesity. He doesn't do anything on his own, he seeks out others for help. Inactivity can lead to larger than normal children which is worse than how the kid in the commercial ended up (sad and with an empty lollipop stick more than likely covered in owl saliva).
None of the characters in the commercial are worthy of cheering for: the child is dumb and lazy, the turtle is slow (not just speed-wise, but thinking-wise as well, and the owl is basically satan in fowl form. Plus, the message it sends out is awful (though it might be a better idea as a parent to feed animals candy than to give your 2-year-old 5 pancakes, plus hashbrowns, plus french-toast, and giving them a chocolate shake to wash it all down with). The last point is kind of a catch-22, in that the kid is lazy, but also seems to be exhibiting an adequate diet. It might be better than a lazy kid who eats the "Tootsie Pop" without even counting how many licks...
I am most certain everyone who reads this has seen (or at least knows of) the "Tootsie Pop" commercials, where an adolescent is in search of the answer to the question "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a 'Tootsie Pop'?" First he encounters a turtle that does not know the answer, but he politely points him in the direction of the wise old owl. Upon finding the owl, he pops the BIG question ("How many licks does it take to get to the center of a 'Tootsie Pop'?"), the owl promptly takes the "Tootsie Pop" in question and begins licking and counting. However, the owl only licks 3 times before giving up and devouring the remaining "Tootsie Pop" and then tells the adolescent that it takes 3 licks to reach the center. Then the ominous voice-over guy utters the famous words, "The world may never know."
I have always had a problem with that commercial. There was just something that irked me so about it. I could never quite put my finger on it (i just figured I hated the owl for not sincerely trying to count how many licks it would take to reach the center), but I have come up with some reasons. Here they are:
1.) The freaking adolescent has the "Tootsie Pop" along with that question burned into his brain for some odd reason, yet instead of finding out for himself, he turns to animals for the answer. Animals cannot communicate with humans using language... stupid.
2.) The turtle (apparently thought wise enough by the kid to answer his queery) doesn't show that he has any brains whatsoever. He is an old turtle that doesn't seem to be portrayed as being healthy (or happy for that matter). He should have taken the candy basically being handed to him by the dumb kid, eaten it while counting licks, and died happily. However, now the turtle is probably dead and never knew the sweet taste of a "Tootsie Pop"... stupid turtle.
3.) The owl is evil (it seems that "Tootsie Pop" advertisers stole a page out of Jesus' parables, by using birds as a picture of evil). The owl completely takes advantage of an all-too-trusting child (albeit a dumb child). He never really tries to get to the bottom of the question at hand, he just eats it as fast as he can and then hands the lollipopless stick back to the kid... evil, dumb owl.
4.) the commercial contributed to obesity in children (before you disregard that last statement, hear me out... or read me out, whatever is the correct phrase for blogging), though it was in a somewhat round-about way. The child is too lazy to eat the candy that he has, obesity in children is due to inactivity (though, an obese child would probably eat a "Tootsie Pop" faster than you could say, "Dang, that kid ate that candy fast!!!") . That is how I feel the commercial contributed to childhood obesity. He doesn't do anything on his own, he seeks out others for help. Inactivity can lead to larger than normal children which is worse than how the kid in the commercial ended up (sad and with an empty lollipop stick more than likely covered in owl saliva).
None of the characters in the commercial are worthy of cheering for: the child is dumb and lazy, the turtle is slow (not just speed-wise, but thinking-wise as well, and the owl is basically satan in fowl form. Plus, the message it sends out is awful (though it might be a better idea as a parent to feed animals candy than to give your 2-year-old 5 pancakes, plus hashbrowns, plus french-toast, and giving them a chocolate shake to wash it all down with). The last point is kind of a catch-22, in that the kid is lazy, but also seems to be exhibiting an adequate diet. It might be better than a lazy kid who eats the "Tootsie Pop" without even counting how many licks...
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Is It...
... weird to love the smell in the desert after it has rained?
... wrong to like being home alone, if only for the chance at being able to sing as loudly as I desire without fear of familial judgment? (no homo)
... bad to find a "Thats what she said!" comment in almost every conversation?
... sad that this is my second blog entry in the last two days?
... awful for me to already be tired of being home for the summer when it hasn't even been two full weeks since I got here?
... hot in here, or is it just me?
... lame of me to try to always end AIM and text conversations with a clever and witty line?
... at all possible to get "black-lung" from inhaling saw dust? Or is it reserved only for coal miners? Or would it be possible to get something like "black-lung" from sawdust called "sandy-colored-lung," like "black-lung's" distant cousin twice removed?
... odd that I find myself more humorous while sitting behind a screen and keyboard, whether it be a computer or cell phone or whatever else has a screen and a keyboard?
... OK that I end this entry now?
... wrong to like being home alone, if only for the chance at being able to sing as loudly as I desire without fear of familial judgment? (no homo)
... bad to find a "Thats what she said!" comment in almost every conversation?
... sad that this is my second blog entry in the last two days?
... awful for me to already be tired of being home for the summer when it hasn't even been two full weeks since I got here?
... hot in here, or is it just me?
... lame of me to try to always end AIM and text conversations with a clever and witty line?
... at all possible to get "black-lung" from inhaling saw dust? Or is it reserved only for coal miners? Or would it be possible to get something like "black-lung" from sawdust called "sandy-colored-lung," like "black-lung's" distant cousin twice removed?
... odd that I find myself more humorous while sitting behind a screen and keyboard, whether it be a computer or cell phone or whatever else has a screen and a keyboard?
... OK that I end this entry now?
Random Musings of an Insomniac?
It has come to my attention since coming back home for the summer that I have a hard time getting to sleep before 1 or 2 in the morning. Now, back at school thats really nothing, but being at home where my parents often go to bed shortly after 10 pm and I'm left to try and find something on tv to watch to entertain myself until I feel tired enough to at least try and go to sleep (let's be real, ESPN is awesome, but they tend to just show replayed shows at around 11 pm and the History Channel, Discovery Channel, and the National Geographic Channel just show the same shows in a row after 10 pm. After 10 pm is basically television purgatory). I am still unable to sleep and it is 1:10 am. I may be suffering from insomnia, but I'm not 100% clear on all the details of that, so I don't really feel comfortable saying I'm an insomniac... yet, anyways.
Kris Allen won American Idol, I know you were all dying to know who won (I hope you all could figure out that I was being sarcastic). I'm not a real avid watcher of American Idol, but I watched tonight in hopes of seeing the awkwardly--gothicly--flambouantly--over-rated, Adam lose. It was a sweet victory for all who were somewhat scared of Adam's... well, I'm not really sure how to properly describe his clothing, hair, make-up (why does any man ever need to wear make-up, especially voluntarily?), and shrieking of the high-notes in every FREAKIN' song. The weird dude (?) lost, my faith in humanity is restored.
The Giants have lost 2 staright to the Padres, both by the score of 2 - 1. I know the Giants offense is, for lack of a better term, offensive, but only scoring 2 runs in 2 games against the Padres is horrible. Last I checked the Giants were second in the NL West, but this series is making me question for how much longer. Barry Zito even pitched well in the first game, but still didn't get the win... my feelings are, you just don't know how many good starts Barry Zito has in him, so score some runs when he pitches to at least give yourselves a fighting chance. One last note about the Giants... if Brian Sabean and Bruce Bochy keep their jobs for next season, then my hope in humanity (that was just restored by Kris Allen winning American Idol) will be destroyed.
Kris Allen won American Idol, I know you were all dying to know who won (I hope you all could figure out that I was being sarcastic). I'm not a real avid watcher of American Idol, but I watched tonight in hopes of seeing the awkwardly--gothicly--flambouantly--over-rated, Adam lose. It was a sweet victory for all who were somewhat scared of Adam's... well, I'm not really sure how to properly describe his clothing, hair, make-up (why does any man ever need to wear make-up, especially voluntarily?), and shrieking of the high-notes in every FREAKIN' song. The weird dude (?) lost, my faith in humanity is restored.
The Giants have lost 2 staright to the Padres, both by the score of 2 - 1. I know the Giants offense is, for lack of a better term, offensive, but only scoring 2 runs in 2 games against the Padres is horrible. Last I checked the Giants were second in the NL West, but this series is making me question for how much longer. Barry Zito even pitched well in the first game, but still didn't get the win... my feelings are, you just don't know how many good starts Barry Zito has in him, so score some runs when he pitches to at least give yourselves a fighting chance. One last note about the Giants... if Brian Sabean and Bruce Bochy keep their jobs for next season, then my hope in humanity (that was just restored by Kris Allen winning American Idol) will be destroyed.
Monday, May 11, 2009
My First Day of Summer
So, yesterday marked my first full day back at home for the summer. Overall, it was a very relaxing day: watched a couple baseball games, hung out with my mom for Mother's Day, ate good food (no more caf for 4 months), and best of all, I didn't have to worry about school work for the upcoming week. It was a tad bit boring, but nothing to really destroy my day.
Since I had a nice day, I should have figured that my night would somehow ruin it. I decided to try and go to sleep at around 11 so I could wake up early and go running, however my head had other plans. I fell asleep fine, but I tossed and turned until 4:30 this morning when I finally woke-up due to a headache. I tried to power through the headache and fall asleep again, but after several minutes it became apparent that that would be impossible. I then went to the kitchen and found some sleeping pills, so I took a couple (the recommended dosage, so don't fret). I then went back to bed hopeful to sleep again until my alarm would awaken me at 7:30. However, those pills I took must have expired or something, because I didn't fall asleep again for another couple of hours.
As if that weren't bad enough, my alarm on my phone failed to go off. It would appear that my phone decided to start turning itself off again for no reason. It is currently working now though. I ended up waking up at 11, so it was a 12 hour adventure for me, from the time
Since I had a nice day, I should have figured that my night would somehow ruin it. I decided to try and go to sleep at around 11 so I could wake up early and go running, however my head had other plans. I fell asleep fine, but I tossed and turned until 4:30 this morning when I finally woke-up due to a headache. I tried to power through the headache and fall asleep again, but after several minutes it became apparent that that would be impossible. I then went to the kitchen and found some sleeping pills, so I took a couple (the recommended dosage, so don't fret). I then went back to bed hopeful to sleep again until my alarm would awaken me at 7:30. However, those pills I took must have expired or something, because I didn't fall asleep again for another couple of hours.
As if that weren't bad enough, my alarm on my phone failed to go off. It would appear that my phone decided to start turning itself off again for no reason. It is currently working now though. I ended up waking up at 11, so it was a 12 hour adventure for me, from the time
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
